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Ja’mie: Private School Girl – Episode 6

by MJ Snow
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Never one to balk at stretching the boundaries, the ever amazing Chris Lilley gave us a Ja’mie series finale that we will never forget. In the season finale of Ja’mie: Private School Girl, Ja’mie’s got a plan to show Hilford that passing her over for the Hilford Medal was a very bad idea, indeed. And boy did she pull it off! By exposing herself on Presentation Day, Ja’mie showed us all that she can not be so easily silenced. The image of Ja’mie, standing topless before the entire school was a shock to many, as Lilley, who plays Ja’mie, is a man. I don’t think anyone can argue that it was a surprise that was pulled off incredibly well, and that Chris Lilley will never cease to impress with his bold take on comedy.

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The Recap

 We open with Ja’mie and Cody lounging on Ja’mie’s bed as Jhyll, Ja’mie’s mom, weakly tries to get the girls ready to leave the house. Above the bed are elaborate shrines to both Mitchell and Kwami, making us wonder… will Ja’mie ever really decide between the two boys? Ja’mie tells Cody that she’s got an elaborate plan for Presentation Day, whetting our appetite for her big revenge scheme.

Mitchell, having split up with Madison Cartwright, is back to sending dick pics to Ja’mie, while Cody inquires about Ja’mie’s continued interest in “the African.” Ja’mie admits to having feelings for Kwami, however, “But it would never work out for obvs reasons,” she says, citing their races as an obstacle. A skype call from Ja’mie’s grandfather interrupts the discussion, and we get to see Ja’mie at her most terrifying. Her baby talk skype convo with “Gampy,” is, by far, the creepiest moment of the season. Horrified by the exchange, Cody asks Ja’mie why she’d been speaking like “a spastic child,” to which she responds, “because he’s rich and going to be dead soon.”

After Cody heads home, Ja’mie and Jhyll have a bonding moment over the fact that Marcus, Ja’mie’s dad, plans to bring his hot assistant, Mandy, to Presentation day. Ja’mie almost kindly responds, “Mum, you do realize Dad’s an idiot. He’s just really rich, and that’s why we need him. That’s pretty much all guys are good for.” It’s the closest thing to a bonding moment we’ve seen between Ja’mie and Jhyll, and it’s kind of lovely. Sadly, though, the moment is fleeting, and Ja’mie is back to her usual insults, before insinuating, again, that she plans to shock the world at the Graduation.

It’s finally time for the ceremony to begin, and we look on as Erin, the fat, lesbian boarder, is gifted with the Hilford Medal. When Ja’mie’s song is announced, she takes the microphone and here’s where things really get good. She publicly denounces the school for awarding the Hilford Medal to “a grossly overweight lesbian boarder.” Her accusations continue as she states that the reason she was passed over for the award was that, “I chose to expose my breasts on Skype in front of the boy that I love,” she says. “Because I chose to have an interracial relationship, the leaders of this school have decided to silence me.”

The prefects switch the presentation laptop for Madison’s MacBook and the girls join Ja’mie on the stage for a sexy dance routine. “Get your tits out girls, unite, no matter how big your tits are, get them out.” Ja’mie urges, and she and the prefects drop their dresses to the floor, standing before the school assembly in their bras and panties. Ja’mie, however, is ready to take things one step further, removing her bra in front of the whole school, singing just one single line… “I’m learning to be me.”

The fact that a 40 year old man is showing his prosthetic breasts to the student body is forgotten for a moment, as we cheer for Ja’mie’s bravery and her self expression. Then we remember it’s actually Chris Lilley, and we’re once again impressed, as his tits look great! You go Chris!

Cut to one month later and we find Ja’mie sitting on her bed in a bit of a fussy floral jacket and lavender dress combo. She kisses one of her Kwami pictures and tells us of the expulsion of the prefects after the Presentation Day incident. The YouTube videos of graduation performance went viral, until sadly, the school had them shut down. We follow her to the airport, as she is leaving to fly to Africa for her gap year to do AIDS charity work. Suddenly, in a major plot twist, she charters a helicopter instead, landing in a practice field at Kelton Boys’ Grammar. Disembarking from her chopper, she runs across the field and into Mitchell’s waiting arms. The moral of Ja’mie’s story? “More important than school, friends or helping Africans” is love.

Fade to black.

But wait! We’re not quite finished with Ja’mie yet!

 “Deep down inside, I’ll always be a private school girl.”

Six months later, Ja’mie and the prefects are enrolled in a public school… but everyone’s really hot, so you don’t even notice. Ja’mie has embarked on her bisexual phase and is in a serious relationship with a girl named Astrid. “Babes, I will go back to the cock at any fucking point.” She threatens, when Astrid gets difficult. Ja’mie has her girlfriend, her girls and a new, emo-hipster-boho wardrobe. She’s able to express herself through dance, boss her friends around, and snub the Asian girls. Things have never been better, she tells us, but “Deep down inside, I’ll always be a private school girl.”

What We’ve Learned

  • While at first they can be quite thrilling, dick pics get old, and fast.
  • Some men are idiots, but if they are really rich, it’s a good idea to keep them around. Ready money makes life a whole lot easier.
  • No one fucks with Ja’mie and gets away with it. No one. Don’t ever allow people to fuck with you, not without severe consequences.
  • Be unforgettable! It is up to you to make yourself the most memorable person you can be. If you can’t be the Hilford Medalist, it’s important to go out with a bang. Probably the best way to do that is to take your clothes off.
  • Once a private school girl, always a private school girl. Life in private school will be the foundation that will shape you into the person you”ll one day become.

This look into the life of today’s high school girl has been quite frighteningly realistic. I, personally, am both happy and sad to find that things for girls have not changed much since my high school days. Each week, I’ve been transported back in time as I’ve watched the events of Ja’mie’s high school drama unfold. While my own high school days aren’t a time I’d choose to return to, I must admit that it’s been fun to travel back to school, via Ja’mie.

Will things ever change for Ja’mie, or for high school girls the world over? Will we, as human beings, ever really stop acting like high schoolers? Probably not. Deep down inside, we will most likely all retain a good bit of our high school selves, for better or worse.

Here at HBO Watch, we are ever so excited about Chris Lilley’s announcement of his next six episode series, which will be based around Jonah Takalua, the Tongan “bored, teenage delinquent” whom we first met in Lilley’s Summer Heights High. Check out the teaser here:

MJ Snow is a Canine and avian behavior specialist, role player, blogger and writer.  A long time George RR Martin fangirl and Game of Thrones Addict, MJ spends way too much time in Westeros. MJ is the co-founder of The Snow Keep, a short story and fan-ficiton blog, and founder of  The Brothers Clegane, a Sandor & Gregor Clegane tribute blog. She also co-curates several other Game of Thrones themed blogs.

MJ on Twitter  Google Plus

 

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2 comments

Jacob Klein January 2, 2014 - 2:06 pm

Wow I had no idea about the upcoming JONAH. Loved that character almost as much as Ja’mie from SHH. Hope it also makes it to HBO!

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MJ Snow January 6, 2014 - 2:15 pm

I’m BEYOND excited for Jonah! I’ll keep my ear to the ground for more news on the upcoming series and keep you posted! :D It will come to HBO, it HAS TO!

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